Through all three of my contracts I’ve heard of this little restaurant in Nassau where the food is good and the internet is free. I’ve never had the opportunity to eat there until yesterday. Down a cozy little street, filled with idyllic Bahamian shops and street vendors selling their tin can creations, there is a little bistro known as Olives Mediterranean Grill. My friends have been there many times and sing its praises often. So I finally had a chance to get off with a friend and pay a visit to this place I’d heard so much about.
Now before I go into too much detail, let me tell you a little bit about Nassau. For those of you that have never been, the first thing you probably picture in your mind is Atlantis. The towering pink stone resort home to Aquaventure and many Dolphin Cove experiences is in Nassau, and it’s dominating on the skyline. However, the cruise ships essentially park in the ghetto and it’s a fifteen minute taxi ride to Atlantis with a driver who learned to drive by playing Grand Theft Auto. So when I think of Nassau, the picture I get in my head is the water lapping against the docks and a multitude of Bahamian men shouting about tours and offering free rides if you’re pretty.
The first street you come across is dotted with knock-off souvenir stores selling everything from “official” Harley-Davidson merchandise to duty-free liquor and cigars. Go down a side street and you’ll pass Starbucks (the saving grace for Disney Cruise Line crew members) and Hard Rock Cafe and then you get to the main street. Here you’ll find a tropical version of Rodeo Drive splashed with Bahamian flavor along the way. Example, in between Cartier and Versace is a Bob Marley tribute store. The further in you go the crazier things get. Eventually you’ll come across Fort Charlotte on the east side and Adastra Gardens & Zoo further up and in. Somewhere there is a Pirate Museum, which I have yet to find. Everywhere, there are random shops and plenty of people willing to sell you black market knockoffs.
So now that we’ve established Nassau, I return to my disastrous lunch. When the waitress handed us our menus I immediately scanned for anything claiming to be meat. I am not stupid enough to order beef from a street side Bahamian cafe. I know what happens. It’s equivalent to drinking the tap water in Mexico. So I found something safe, Grilled Ham and Cheese sandwich with seasoned fries. Okay, simple enough. To be fair it was prosciutto, provolone, and tomato on ciabatta bread grilled panini style. But still, a completely safe choice... or so I thought. Cut to three hours later as I’m sitting in the workshop teaching a table full of little girls that cup game (see Anna Kendrick in Pitch Perfect) when it hits right in the pit of my stomach.
“We’re gonna have a situation.” I say to the GA (essentially the floor manager) and run to the bathroom. I’ll spare you the details here. Use your imagination. So I do what I must and go immediately to my room where I have to call the duty nurse and report my ailment. She has me come down to medical where I am informed that I will be put into medical isolation.
Crazy lady say what? I ate something weird. I was just doing what I was supposed to by reporting it. I fully expected you to hand me some tums and tell me to go back to work. But medical isolation!? Are you kidding me?
So here I sit, alone, in a legit hospital bed, NOT SICK, but still isolated. I had another bout this morning (after effects of Nassau) and I get locked down for another 24hours. SERIOUSLY?! When I came to you last contract with the flu, you gave me some Advil and a shove out the door. This time around, I report eating nasty meat and you put me in lockdown!? Where exactly did you people get your medical licenses?
Speaking of the kind people working in medical, let me first say they are NOT Disney employees. They are hired from outside the company and are brought in without having to go through any Disney training or qualifications. So the cheerful, kind, and gracious doctors you may be expecting are not what you get here. There are a few on the team that are nice. But only a few. Most of them have the bedside manner of an angry German Fräulein. In fact, this morning while I was in a dead sleep, Fräuleins 1 and 2 burst through my door without so much as a knock and turned on the overhead lights so they could root through the supply cabinet in my room. At this point, I’m having a spasm in bed trying to shield my eyes from the blinding light. Then after they’ve shouted a while they leave, without turning off the lights. WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?! You better be happy I was too busy trying to protect my eyes and not awake enough to yell at you. I probably would’ve been taken to HR for the things that would’ve come flying out of my mouth. But you deserved them. Please know it was a scathing description of your actions followed by an attack on your bedside manner and a blistering dismissal of how you were raised.
So here I sit. Still. If I could dig my way out with a plastic spoon and cover the hole with a giant poster of Ryan Gosling I would. Please someone rescue me.
Until next time (if they ever let me leave...)
See Ya Real Soon!
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Monday, January 7, 2013
Back for Thirds...
So we’re two days into my third contract working for Disney Cruise Line. Some exciting news, my manager is putting through the paperwork and such to make my Entertainment Host role a permanent one. Boom! For anyone wondering, I am technically still classified as a Temporary Assignment, or TA Line. This means that I am just filling the gap until a Permanent Host become available. Before now, if that happened, I would’ve been stepped back down to a counselor position. But once everything is cleared and signed off... they’re stuck with me. Win.
A start of contract would not be complete without a trip to Wardrobe and an epic battle over who is right (me) and who is wrong (them). It’s like they could sense my presence on board and thought to themselves, “Let’s see how difficult we can make her life this time around!” So there I am, waiting in line with all the people who embarked with me, repeating the mantra, “I will be patient with Wardrobe” in my head. All is going well, the line is moving fairly quickly, which is a rare occurrence indeed, and I’m just starting to think things are going to be okay. That when I see it. Sitting in the pile of returning crew members name badges is mine. Spelled, A-L-L-I-S-O-N. Fail number one. It is at this point the dark sense of foreboding begins to creep over my shoulder and pierce my soul.
I get up to the desk, and in a weird twist of fate, it is the same woman I had so much trouble with last time. I inform her that my name is misspelled and she has me add my name to the long list of others that need to be redone. Okay, maybe this will be the only mishap. She goes to get my costumes and returns with clothes fit for a resident of Munchkin Land. Sweet Lord above, it has happened again. They still have me in their system as the other Alison. The one who NO LONGER WORKS FOR DCL! She actually realized her error at this point and start to shake her head and smirk. “We’ve been here before,” she says. I concur and we go through the ordeal of getting the correct sizes.
So it comes to asking for my pant length, “I’m a 34.” I say and wait for her to go get them. She doesn’t move though. She stands there, starring at me in disbelief.
“I’m a 32. There is no way you can be a 34.”
“I have long legs. I’m 5’ 10”.
“I don’t believe you.”
“Trust me, I’m a 34. You can give me 32s but they will be too short. I had 32s last contract and my manager made me come down and change them out for 34s because they were high-waters. Can we please skip all that and you just give me 34s?”
“You are not a 34.”
“Yes. I am.”
“Come back here, I need to measure. There’s no way you’re a 34.”
Now at this point, that little mantra I was trying to hold fast to has shattered into one million pieces, caught fire, and begun smoldering. My patience is gone. After talking to some other crew members, I have yet to find a single person that leaves wardrobe in a good mood. This is why. I go back into the sewing room where she gets the head seamstress to measure me. She pulls out her official DCL measuring tape and finds my natural waist line (cause that’s where we have to wear our pants) and measures down to the top of my foot. Low and behold, the number she came up with was 34! She then stands up and stares at my legs like they are aliens and finally mutters out, “I guess you were right.”
You think? You think I’m not right about the length of my own pants? I am 5’10”, Woman. I do not joke about pant length.
After that huge ordeal, I went to Safety Familiarization, commonly referred to as Safety Fam, and prayed to God I didn’t get a safety duty. My last two contracts I have been given a Traffic Controller duty somewhere in the uppermost decks of the ship. This means that every single embark I have to climb 11+ flights of stairs in a limited amount of time and then direct the thousands of guests on board to their Assembly stations. This is a very important job, don’t get me wrong. But I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that in the event of a real emergency I wouldn’t make it up 11 flights of stairs, fighting against the flow of panicked guests. So I am praying hard for something a little closer to Deck 5 (where the YA spaces are located). They pass out the safety cards and the Lord gave me a gift. No drill duty. The rare and coveted safety card. The only thing I have to do is show up at the life raft in the event of an emergency. I expect to hold on to this safety card for roughly two cruises. There is no way they’ll let me keep it. I don’t have that kind of luck.
My luck has already been received in the form of my Ent Host costumes. Not only did everything arrive on the same day I did, it was all the right size and quantity. I haven’t seen my wigs yet, but they have been restyling most of them. And when I say all of my costumes, I mean all. Lab and Club. Which is unheard of. I got to see my pajamas for Pluto’s Pajama Party. They come with the best slippers. They’ve got baby ducks on them. I am beyond excited. It’s the little things that make me happy.
Little things like getting an awesome roommate. Well, truthfully that’s no little thing. In my time on board I’ve had every type of roommate from “I need complete silence and darkness to sleep. Do NOT wake me.” to “Hey, it’s 4am and I’ve brought a boy home. We’re gonna be noisy.” So having a good roommate is a HUGE thing. My new roomie is a girl named, Juliette. She is amazing and I love her. We were friends last contract and kept trying to room together and it just didn’t work out. So she requested me before I even got back and our managers sorted everything out for us. Praise!
Things are going well so far. I’m getting back into the swing of things. My feet hurt. Spending the majority of your vacation sleeping and lying in bed with hours of Netflix makes you forget about long hours on your feet everyday. I have been reminded. I will be buying some Dr Scholls insoles the first chance I get. I will also be buying some trash bags. Apparently our housekeeper has a distaste for trash bags and refuses to leave us any, opting instead for a simple paper liner that sets in the bottom. He also has a distaste for toilet paper. But he changes our sheets and vacuums, so I will just suck it up and buy stuff at Wal-Mart.
More updates to come, with hilarious shenanigans to ensue! Until next time...
See Ya Real Soon!
A start of contract would not be complete without a trip to Wardrobe and an epic battle over who is right (me) and who is wrong (them). It’s like they could sense my presence on board and thought to themselves, “Let’s see how difficult we can make her life this time around!” So there I am, waiting in line with all the people who embarked with me, repeating the mantra, “I will be patient with Wardrobe” in my head. All is going well, the line is moving fairly quickly, which is a rare occurrence indeed, and I’m just starting to think things are going to be okay. That when I see it. Sitting in the pile of returning crew members name badges is mine. Spelled, A-L-L-I-S-O-N. Fail number one. It is at this point the dark sense of foreboding begins to creep over my shoulder and pierce my soul.
I get up to the desk, and in a weird twist of fate, it is the same woman I had so much trouble with last time. I inform her that my name is misspelled and she has me add my name to the long list of others that need to be redone. Okay, maybe this will be the only mishap. She goes to get my costumes and returns with clothes fit for a resident of Munchkin Land. Sweet Lord above, it has happened again. They still have me in their system as the other Alison. The one who NO LONGER WORKS FOR DCL! She actually realized her error at this point and start to shake her head and smirk. “We’ve been here before,” she says. I concur and we go through the ordeal of getting the correct sizes.
So it comes to asking for my pant length, “I’m a 34.” I say and wait for her to go get them. She doesn’t move though. She stands there, starring at me in disbelief.
“I’m a 32. There is no way you can be a 34.”
“I have long legs. I’m 5’ 10”.
“I don’t believe you.”
“Trust me, I’m a 34. You can give me 32s but they will be too short. I had 32s last contract and my manager made me come down and change them out for 34s because they were high-waters. Can we please skip all that and you just give me 34s?”
“You are not a 34.”
“Yes. I am.”
“Come back here, I need to measure. There’s no way you’re a 34.”
Now at this point, that little mantra I was trying to hold fast to has shattered into one million pieces, caught fire, and begun smoldering. My patience is gone. After talking to some other crew members, I have yet to find a single person that leaves wardrobe in a good mood. This is why. I go back into the sewing room where she gets the head seamstress to measure me. She pulls out her official DCL measuring tape and finds my natural waist line (cause that’s where we have to wear our pants) and measures down to the top of my foot. Low and behold, the number she came up with was 34! She then stands up and stares at my legs like they are aliens and finally mutters out, “I guess you were right.”
You think? You think I’m not right about the length of my own pants? I am 5’10”, Woman. I do not joke about pant length.
After that huge ordeal, I went to Safety Familiarization, commonly referred to as Safety Fam, and prayed to God I didn’t get a safety duty. My last two contracts I have been given a Traffic Controller duty somewhere in the uppermost decks of the ship. This means that every single embark I have to climb 11+ flights of stairs in a limited amount of time and then direct the thousands of guests on board to their Assembly stations. This is a very important job, don’t get me wrong. But I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that in the event of a real emergency I wouldn’t make it up 11 flights of stairs, fighting against the flow of panicked guests. So I am praying hard for something a little closer to Deck 5 (where the YA spaces are located). They pass out the safety cards and the Lord gave me a gift. No drill duty. The rare and coveted safety card. The only thing I have to do is show up at the life raft in the event of an emergency. I expect to hold on to this safety card for roughly two cruises. There is no way they’ll let me keep it. I don’t have that kind of luck.
My luck has already been received in the form of my Ent Host costumes. Not only did everything arrive on the same day I did, it was all the right size and quantity. I haven’t seen my wigs yet, but they have been restyling most of them. And when I say all of my costumes, I mean all. Lab and Club. Which is unheard of. I got to see my pajamas for Pluto’s Pajama Party. They come with the best slippers. They’ve got baby ducks on them. I am beyond excited. It’s the little things that make me happy.
Little things like getting an awesome roommate. Well, truthfully that’s no little thing. In my time on board I’ve had every type of roommate from “I need complete silence and darkness to sleep. Do NOT wake me.” to “Hey, it’s 4am and I’ve brought a boy home. We’re gonna be noisy.” So having a good roommate is a HUGE thing. My new roomie is a girl named, Juliette. She is amazing and I love her. We were friends last contract and kept trying to room together and it just didn’t work out. So she requested me before I even got back and our managers sorted everything out for us. Praise!
Things are going well so far. I’m getting back into the swing of things. My feet hurt. Spending the majority of your vacation sleeping and lying in bed with hours of Netflix makes you forget about long hours on your feet everyday. I have been reminded. I will be buying some Dr Scholls insoles the first chance I get. I will also be buying some trash bags. Apparently our housekeeper has a distaste for trash bags and refuses to leave us any, opting instead for a simple paper liner that sets in the bottom. He also has a distaste for toilet paper. But he changes our sheets and vacuums, so I will just suck it up and buy stuff at Wal-Mart.
More updates to come, with hilarious shenanigans to ensue! Until next time...
See Ya Real Soon!
Saturday, October 6, 2012
Baby Yenta and the Search for Mr. Right...
So today we were at Castaway again and for once I was actually scheduled on Scuttle time. Usually I’m digging for whale/velociraptor bones or throwing a Caribbean Beach Party, so just being able to play is a nice change. At least, that’s what I thought until I met Deandra.
Deandra is a sweet little girl, age 7, from Atlanta who took one look at me and decided we were besties. After about thirty minutes she got the question every kid asks me at some point, “How old are you?” To which my reply is always, “How old do you think I am?” After looking at me long and hard she announces to everyone that I am sixteen. Yup. I was shocked too. Anyhow, after proclaiming my age she moved on to the second most popular question I get asked, “Do you have a boyfriend?” To which my reply is always, “Nope. Too busy.” And this is where she shocked the living daylights out of me...
“Well, you’re cute, you need one. I’m gonna find you one.” She then proceeds to ask me my likes and dislikes, favorite color, favorite movie, and favorite things to wear. Once she gleaned enough information she proceeded to point out every male in the near vicinity and ask me what I thought of them. After giving her the lowdown on who already had a girlfriend and who didn’t she settled on one of the guys and told me to ask him out. Little did she know, she had picked out a gay man. So with a sly grin I asked him to be my boyfriend, and obviously he accepted. Deandra then decided out courtship had been long enough and told us we should get married. The girl was relentless.
When I told her that we couldn’t get married because he hadn’t asked me yet, she just rolled her eyes and said, “Well he better hurry, otherwise I’m gonna set you up on Match.com.” This girl was seven. SEVEN! She eventually grew tired of matchmaking and moved on to find love for some other YA counselor, but the moment is one I will remember for a long time.
Speaking of finding Mr Right, my friends are getting married today and it kills me that I can’t be there to celebrate with them. So here’s to Travis and Rachel Williams! May your marriage last to the end of your days and be filled with happiness, joy, laughter, and Dave Matthews Band. So happy for you both!
Moving on to other things - as of tomorrow I only have three weeks left in my contract!! They are finally letting me go home!!! I bought space bags in preparation for the great packing adventure. One accumulates more clothes than one arrived with when they are here for six months.
Six months... geez it’s been a long time. I think about things that I’ve done and people I’ve met and I have a really hard time placing it in my contract. Some people were new hires, completed the first contract and are now returning for their second contract and I am STILL here. I figured out the other day that I am missing my one year anniversary with the company by four days. November 2 is my official one year anniversary and I leave on October 28. I’m gonna ask and see if they will give me my year pin on my last cruise. We shall see what happens.
Can’t wait to see everyone! Until next time...
See Ya Real Soon!!
Deandra is a sweet little girl, age 7, from Atlanta who took one look at me and decided we were besties. After about thirty minutes she got the question every kid asks me at some point, “How old are you?” To which my reply is always, “How old do you think I am?” After looking at me long and hard she announces to everyone that I am sixteen. Yup. I was shocked too. Anyhow, after proclaiming my age she moved on to the second most popular question I get asked, “Do you have a boyfriend?” To which my reply is always, “Nope. Too busy.” And this is where she shocked the living daylights out of me...
“Well, you’re cute, you need one. I’m gonna find you one.” She then proceeds to ask me my likes and dislikes, favorite color, favorite movie, and favorite things to wear. Once she gleaned enough information she proceeded to point out every male in the near vicinity and ask me what I thought of them. After giving her the lowdown on who already had a girlfriend and who didn’t she settled on one of the guys and told me to ask him out. Little did she know, she had picked out a gay man. So with a sly grin I asked him to be my boyfriend, and obviously he accepted. Deandra then decided out courtship had been long enough and told us we should get married. The girl was relentless.
When I told her that we couldn’t get married because he hadn’t asked me yet, she just rolled her eyes and said, “Well he better hurry, otherwise I’m gonna set you up on Match.com.” This girl was seven. SEVEN! She eventually grew tired of matchmaking and moved on to find love for some other YA counselor, but the moment is one I will remember for a long time.
Speaking of finding Mr Right, my friends are getting married today and it kills me that I can’t be there to celebrate with them. So here’s to Travis and Rachel Williams! May your marriage last to the end of your days and be filled with happiness, joy, laughter, and Dave Matthews Band. So happy for you both!
Moving on to other things - as of tomorrow I only have three weeks left in my contract!! They are finally letting me go home!!! I bought space bags in preparation for the great packing adventure. One accumulates more clothes than one arrived with when they are here for six months.
Six months... geez it’s been a long time. I think about things that I’ve done and people I’ve met and I have a really hard time placing it in my contract. Some people were new hires, completed the first contract and are now returning for their second contract and I am STILL here. I figured out the other day that I am missing my one year anniversary with the company by four days. November 2 is my official one year anniversary and I leave on October 28. I’m gonna ask and see if they will give me my year pin on my last cruise. We shall see what happens.
Can’t wait to see everyone! Until next time...
See Ya Real Soon!!
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Rounding Third and Heading for Home...
Over the last month I’ve really started to appreciate life on a ship. Mainly for the people I get to meet and things I am able to do. But I would be lying if I said I wasn’t ready to come home. It’s been a long time and I’m starting to get that all too familiar ache to see Kentucky. Don’t get me wrong, the ocean is fabulous, but this girl needs some land under her feet every so often.
I do have some very good news to report about my vacation. For anyone that doesn’t know, my extension was approved and I will be home October 28 - January 6th. Ten glorious weeks of family, friends, and Christmas cheer! I’m so excited I could pee my pants. Literally.
Recently, we’ve had lots of new hires come on board and they all seem to be very cool people. In the latest batch, we had a new hire ent host for the Club side. It was kind of a surreal moment when I met her because she just looked at me and said, “You’re Allyson! The girl with the blog!” I was a little dazed to say the least. I know people back home read this blog, but I never really thought other people did. Goes to show what I know. Her name is Abigail and she’s from England and according to her my blog was rather helpful in knowing what to expect! I’m feeling rather accomplished now. :)
As far as program go, you’ll all be excited to know that I FINALLY received my very own Dig costume! I’ve only been here since April 29... borrowing other people’s costumes or wearing my glorious YA island attire. But roughly three weeks ago I got my very own shapeless khaki shorts, stuffy orange tshirt, and camper vest. They are amazing and, I say this with actual sincerity, I love them. Speaking of Dig, I don’t know if I’ve ever told you about my professor friend...
Scarlett Rae Nadine hails from Newark, NJ and is very proud of her two-year online degree from the University of Ipswich in Paleontology. She has watched Jurassic Park four times and therefore knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that the giant skeleton in Monstro’s Point is a velociraptor. Albeit, a very large velociraptor, but a velociraptor nonetheless. Other professors have tried to convince her that it is actually a sperm whale, but Scarlett just smiles sweetly and says her favorite phrase, “Agree to disagree, honey...” and then mumbles something about “Why would I waste my degree on some silly fish?” She’s a peach.
An update on other characters and their lives...
Rosie Blackwater, famed pirate of the seven seas, has entered into a exciting new relationship with none other than Captain Hook! Who needs Jack Sparrow when one can be on the arm of the most fashionably dressed pirate in town? (Just don’t tell Captain Hook... Rosie has to tell him first.)
Winifred Penelope Make-O-Mess, III is quickly becoming a fan favorite. She has started to let the children know a little more about her history. For example, she tells stories about herself and her younger brother, Magnesium and the ill-fated day they tried to make flubber with dynamite. Not a good idea, mind you, since that is what caused her hair (and his for that matter) to turn such a lovely shade of green. She also recounts tales of her college days with roommates Breckan and Juliette. Poor girls didn’t know what was coming when they found Winnie on the floor with her beaker set on move-in day. Let’s just say, their beloved pets - Mr Sprinkles (a cat) and Bo-bo (a bird) - did not survive the situation. Winnie loves to experiment with dynamite...
Guinter has been taking “Be a Lady” Lessons with Detective Clue due to her tendency to steal things... like baby pygmy hippos. She actually received a gold star in curtseying last week during her work on Get The Hook. She showed off her excellent curtsies to Captain Hook and Mr Smee, who were most impressed. Next week, Guinter will be working on posture and balance. I hear tell ribbon dancing is involved.
Enough updates for now. I have plenty of other stories I am not legally allowed to put in writing, but I’ll be happy to hint vaguely at their nature over some Orange Leaf or Starbucks when I get home.
Until next time...
See Ya Real Soon!
I do have some very good news to report about my vacation. For anyone that doesn’t know, my extension was approved and I will be home October 28 - January 6th. Ten glorious weeks of family, friends, and Christmas cheer! I’m so excited I could pee my pants. Literally.
Recently, we’ve had lots of new hires come on board and they all seem to be very cool people. In the latest batch, we had a new hire ent host for the Club side. It was kind of a surreal moment when I met her because she just looked at me and said, “You’re Allyson! The girl with the blog!” I was a little dazed to say the least. I know people back home read this blog, but I never really thought other people did. Goes to show what I know. Her name is Abigail and she’s from England and according to her my blog was rather helpful in knowing what to expect! I’m feeling rather accomplished now. :)
As far as program go, you’ll all be excited to know that I FINALLY received my very own Dig costume! I’ve only been here since April 29... borrowing other people’s costumes or wearing my glorious YA island attire. But roughly three weeks ago I got my very own shapeless khaki shorts, stuffy orange tshirt, and camper vest. They are amazing and, I say this with actual sincerity, I love them. Speaking of Dig, I don’t know if I’ve ever told you about my professor friend...
Scarlett Rae Nadine hails from Newark, NJ and is very proud of her two-year online degree from the University of Ipswich in Paleontology. She has watched Jurassic Park four times and therefore knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that the giant skeleton in Monstro’s Point is a velociraptor. Albeit, a very large velociraptor, but a velociraptor nonetheless. Other professors have tried to convince her that it is actually a sperm whale, but Scarlett just smiles sweetly and says her favorite phrase, “Agree to disagree, honey...” and then mumbles something about “Why would I waste my degree on some silly fish?” She’s a peach.
An update on other characters and their lives...
Rosie Blackwater, famed pirate of the seven seas, has entered into a exciting new relationship with none other than Captain Hook! Who needs Jack Sparrow when one can be on the arm of the most fashionably dressed pirate in town? (Just don’t tell Captain Hook... Rosie has to tell him first.)
Winifred Penelope Make-O-Mess, III is quickly becoming a fan favorite. She has started to let the children know a little more about her history. For example, she tells stories about herself and her younger brother, Magnesium and the ill-fated day they tried to make flubber with dynamite. Not a good idea, mind you, since that is what caused her hair (and his for that matter) to turn such a lovely shade of green. She also recounts tales of her college days with roommates Breckan and Juliette. Poor girls didn’t know what was coming when they found Winnie on the floor with her beaker set on move-in day. Let’s just say, their beloved pets - Mr Sprinkles (a cat) and Bo-bo (a bird) - did not survive the situation. Winnie loves to experiment with dynamite...
Guinter has been taking “Be a Lady” Lessons with Detective Clue due to her tendency to steal things... like baby pygmy hippos. She actually received a gold star in curtseying last week during her work on Get The Hook. She showed off her excellent curtsies to Captain Hook and Mr Smee, who were most impressed. Next week, Guinter will be working on posture and balance. I hear tell ribbon dancing is involved.
Enough updates for now. I have plenty of other stories I am not legally allowed to put in writing, but I’ll be happy to hint vaguely at their nature over some Orange Leaf or Starbucks when I get home.
Until next time...
See Ya Real Soon!
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Hurricane Isaac and the Ghosts of Cruises Past...
I’ve been working on board a ship now for almost a year and I’ve never once been seasick. I’ve survived tropical storms, wind gusts, and even children being sick on me, yet none of it phased me in the slightest. Hurricane Isaac, however, made me feel like I was going to lose it. I was standing there, in full Detective mode, discussing case details with the children when I felt the ship pitch to the right and suddenly my future flashed before me. I could see myself blowing my lunch on the first few rows of Junior Detectives seated before me. I paused in my speech and took a deep breath as the ship pitched back to the left. Yup, I was definitely going to lose it. I went to the side and steadied myself against the briefcases we stack against the wall and continued. Luckily, I kept it together for the duration of the program, but for a moment there things were a little iffy.
The rest of the cruise was pretty miserable. Isaac rained out our first day at Castaway, after we were over an hour late at docking due to the choppy seas. The next day was a sea day, and I can honestly say I’ve never seen it look more miserable outside. We ended up having to reschedule Pirate Night and the fireworks for the next day. Parents and kids alike were not pleased. So we rolled into Nassau, to find it full of sunshine (yay!) but that night during the Pirate show, the fireworks failed to go off due to technical difficulties. You can probably imagine how the guests were feeling now. They finally managed to get the fireworks to go off on the last night of the cruise. Of course, many of the Edge children didn’t get to see them because I was scaring the living daylights out of them with Ghost Voyagers.
Ghost Voyagers is a program we have on board aimed at the teens and tweens. We sit them down and explain that we are sailing through the Bermuda Triangle, which is true, and that strange and mysterious things have happened throughout history in this area. We tell them about Blackbeard and the Mary Celeste, and then we tell them about Tina. The story of Tina is a sad and tragic one that I will not repeat here. If you want to hear it, ask me when I get home. The terrifying part is that sometimes Tina is listening. She likes to send us signals when she is there. That really freaks the kids out. This last cruise Tina was very communicative and we had one girl start crying on us. Later that evening when I got home, my roommate informed me she was on Deck 4 when the horde of Edge kids went running by, scared for their lives, and she counted seven crying. Ghost Voyagers for the win! Normally we do not advocate making the children cry, but in this case they want to be scared. They get what they asked for.
Speaking of getting what you ask for, at the moment that’s not really working out for me. When I initially agreed to extend my contract until October 28, (a full two months, people) it was under the impression that I would also have an extended vacation allowing me to be home for Christmas. Well according to the latest roadmap (ie the giant schedule of everyone’s lives and contract dates) I am STILL returning on December 9. This is not okay. Six months on board for only six weeks off? Excuse me, rude! So I am doing my best to stay calm, but I am not accepting this lightly. I am trying every option I can to remind them of their promise and to get my vacation extended. So say a couple prayers and keep your fingers crossed that everything works out. If I am back on this boat before Christmas I will NOT be a happy camper. I love my job, but I love spending holidays with my family more. If you’d like to see the downward spiral of depression that I go through while celebrating Christmas at Sea go have a look at December’s blogs from last year.
Everything should work out well though since there’s about to be a big shake-up in the Ent Host department. Rumor has it some of our hosts are going to the Fantasy and some of the Fantasy hosts are coming here because they have an abundance of trainers and we have one. When that all goes down, contract dates will be different and it will hopefully work to my advantage to have an extended vacation. I’m just hoping they don’t have too many Ent Hosts because then I am the one that gets stepped down, since I’m still technically on a Temporary Line. I don’t receive the permanent line until I come back from vacation. See what they did there? Ensuring I will return by offering me a permanent line? Sneaky. (Granted I was going to return anyway, so there was really no need to try and entice me with a permanent line.)
Moving on to brighter things, I get to have a decent meal this cruise!! My amazing roommate (who thinks she is leaving me in a few weeks to go home, silly Australian) put in a dining request for us and it got approved! We will be eating at Animator’s Palate on Sea Day (aka Pirate Night)! This will be the second time I’ve eaten in Animator’s. I’ve also gotten to eat in Royal Palace twice (once for Captain’s Breakfast, and once for winning the YA Raffle) and Cabana’s twice. The only restaurant, besides Remy and Palo (which I’m technically not allowed to go to), that I haven’t eaten in is Enchanted Garden. Contract goal for next time around! So far my favorite has been the appetizers at Royal Palace and the entrees at Animators for dinner, and the whole of Cabana’s for lunch. Ask my family about Cabana’s, they’ll tell you of its wonders.
The only other thing worth reporting is that I was nominated for Counselor of the Month. We still don’t know who won, and if it wasn’t me that’s okay too. It was a surprise to be nominated since Ent Hosts are usually forgotten, so that’s good enough for me. (Although it would be nice to win, since that means I get to eat another good meal!)
Until next time,
See Ya Real Soon!
The rest of the cruise was pretty miserable. Isaac rained out our first day at Castaway, after we were over an hour late at docking due to the choppy seas. The next day was a sea day, and I can honestly say I’ve never seen it look more miserable outside. We ended up having to reschedule Pirate Night and the fireworks for the next day. Parents and kids alike were not pleased. So we rolled into Nassau, to find it full of sunshine (yay!) but that night during the Pirate show, the fireworks failed to go off due to technical difficulties. You can probably imagine how the guests were feeling now. They finally managed to get the fireworks to go off on the last night of the cruise. Of course, many of the Edge children didn’t get to see them because I was scaring the living daylights out of them with Ghost Voyagers.
Ghost Voyagers is a program we have on board aimed at the teens and tweens. We sit them down and explain that we are sailing through the Bermuda Triangle, which is true, and that strange and mysterious things have happened throughout history in this area. We tell them about Blackbeard and the Mary Celeste, and then we tell them about Tina. The story of Tina is a sad and tragic one that I will not repeat here. If you want to hear it, ask me when I get home. The terrifying part is that sometimes Tina is listening. She likes to send us signals when she is there. That really freaks the kids out. This last cruise Tina was very communicative and we had one girl start crying on us. Later that evening when I got home, my roommate informed me she was on Deck 4 when the horde of Edge kids went running by, scared for their lives, and she counted seven crying. Ghost Voyagers for the win! Normally we do not advocate making the children cry, but in this case they want to be scared. They get what they asked for.
Speaking of getting what you ask for, at the moment that’s not really working out for me. When I initially agreed to extend my contract until October 28, (a full two months, people) it was under the impression that I would also have an extended vacation allowing me to be home for Christmas. Well according to the latest roadmap (ie the giant schedule of everyone’s lives and contract dates) I am STILL returning on December 9. This is not okay. Six months on board for only six weeks off? Excuse me, rude! So I am doing my best to stay calm, but I am not accepting this lightly. I am trying every option I can to remind them of their promise and to get my vacation extended. So say a couple prayers and keep your fingers crossed that everything works out. If I am back on this boat before Christmas I will NOT be a happy camper. I love my job, but I love spending holidays with my family more. If you’d like to see the downward spiral of depression that I go through while celebrating Christmas at Sea go have a look at December’s blogs from last year.
Everything should work out well though since there’s about to be a big shake-up in the Ent Host department. Rumor has it some of our hosts are going to the Fantasy and some of the Fantasy hosts are coming here because they have an abundance of trainers and we have one. When that all goes down, contract dates will be different and it will hopefully work to my advantage to have an extended vacation. I’m just hoping they don’t have too many Ent Hosts because then I am the one that gets stepped down, since I’m still technically on a Temporary Line. I don’t receive the permanent line until I come back from vacation. See what they did there? Ensuring I will return by offering me a permanent line? Sneaky. (Granted I was going to return anyway, so there was really no need to try and entice me with a permanent line.)
Moving on to brighter things, I get to have a decent meal this cruise!! My amazing roommate (who thinks she is leaving me in a few weeks to go home, silly Australian) put in a dining request for us and it got approved! We will be eating at Animator’s Palate on Sea Day (aka Pirate Night)! This will be the second time I’ve eaten in Animator’s. I’ve also gotten to eat in Royal Palace twice (once for Captain’s Breakfast, and once for winning the YA Raffle) and Cabana’s twice. The only restaurant, besides Remy and Palo (which I’m technically not allowed to go to), that I haven’t eaten in is Enchanted Garden. Contract goal for next time around! So far my favorite has been the appetizers at Royal Palace and the entrees at Animators for dinner, and the whole of Cabana’s for lunch. Ask my family about Cabana’s, they’ll tell you of its wonders.
The only other thing worth reporting is that I was nominated for Counselor of the Month. We still don’t know who won, and if it wasn’t me that’s okay too. It was a surprise to be nominated since Ent Hosts are usually forgotten, so that’s good enough for me. (Although it would be nice to win, since that means I get to eat another good meal!)
Until next time,
See Ya Real Soon!
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Captain's Pajamas
So I’m writing this update three days after I was supposed to be back in God’s Country, sleeping in my own bed. Yet here I am, still sailing in the Bahamas. Why, you may ask? Well, after a bunch of stuff went down on the Fantasy, they were in need of a new YA Ent Host. Nicole was sent over to the Fantasy, which then left her line wide open. I had asked to extend so viola! Now I’m here until October 28. But the good news to that is that I will be home for Christmas. They don’t approve vacation extensions until closer to time, but since I agreed to extend for so long, they are working to extend my vacation the extra two weeks to get me past the lockout dates. Technically I am supposed to come back on December 9th. The Lockout Dates (the dates in which no new crew members come on board and no current crew members leave) are December 16 - January 6. So I would be back on board January 6th (ish) and then my contract would go through the end of April / beginning of May. All the details are getting worked out as we speak.
In other news, we’ve restarted a program on board called Captain’s Corner. This is when the captain of the ship comes to one of the YA or Family spaces and has an open Q&A session with the audience. I’ve had the fortunate opportunity to mediate two of these sessions now, one in Edge and one today in the Oceaneer Lab. It’s a really cool moment for the kids to interact with the captain. Today they had loads of questions about driving the boat, who was the safest captain, how much sleep the captain gets, how to become a captain, and other really cool things. There was one kid, however, who told the captain random stories. Example: “My dad has special pants that he sleeps in and then he wears them and goes to sleep.” Captain Guus looked at me and I said the first thing that came to mind, “I think he wants to know if you have special Captain’s Pajamas.” Turns out, in case you were wondering, Captain Guus sleeps in Disney Cruise Line pjs and has a special DCL jogging suit.
I am now making a shameless plea... for mail. I LIKE MAIL. Postcards, letters, care packages stuffed with candy and silly things like playdoh & coloring books. MAIL. It makes me feel loved, just saying. Look to the side of this blog, there are two addresses... one for regular letters and one for packages. If you feel like visiting, send me an email at allyson.m.smith@gmail.com or contact me on Facebook. I also like visitors!!! And let’s be honest, you know you want a short jaunt to Cape Canaveral to check out a Disney Cruise ship and see me! :)
If you can’t make it to Florida, or have forgotten how actual mail works in this age of electronic overload, have no fear! I’ll be home in 80 days. Until then...
See Ya Real Soon!
In other news, we’ve restarted a program on board called Captain’s Corner. This is when the captain of the ship comes to one of the YA or Family spaces and has an open Q&A session with the audience. I’ve had the fortunate opportunity to mediate two of these sessions now, one in Edge and one today in the Oceaneer Lab. It’s a really cool moment for the kids to interact with the captain. Today they had loads of questions about driving the boat, who was the safest captain, how much sleep the captain gets, how to become a captain, and other really cool things. There was one kid, however, who told the captain random stories. Example: “My dad has special pants that he sleeps in and then he wears them and goes to sleep.” Captain Guus looked at me and I said the first thing that came to mind, “I think he wants to know if you have special Captain’s Pajamas.” Turns out, in case you were wondering, Captain Guus sleeps in Disney Cruise Line pjs and has a special DCL jogging suit.
I am now making a shameless plea... for mail. I LIKE MAIL. Postcards, letters, care packages stuffed with candy and silly things like playdoh & coloring books. MAIL. It makes me feel loved, just saying. Look to the side of this blog, there are two addresses... one for regular letters and one for packages. If you feel like visiting, send me an email at allyson.m.smith@gmail.com or contact me on Facebook. I also like visitors!!! And let’s be honest, you know you want a short jaunt to Cape Canaveral to check out a Disney Cruise ship and see me! :)
If you can’t make it to Florida, or have forgotten how actual mail works in this age of electronic overload, have no fear! I’ll be home in 80 days. Until then...
See Ya Real Soon!
Friday, July 13, 2012
Let's Play Catch-Up...
So I hadn’t realized it until one of my friends pointed it out, but it’s been a while since I updated. Whoops!
With the exception of day to day life on board the ship, the only thing worth note in my life is what’s going on with my contract. That is a grand mystery even I don’t know all the details to.
Let me break it down for you. When I first came on board back in April, my crew id card listed my debark date as September 2. When I first approached my manager about extending my contract I discovered I’d already been extended to September 9. So that was the first change. Then I tried to switch contracts with one of the other Ent Hosts, Nicole, and extend my debark date until October 28. Well while that was trying to go through I was given a new contract to sign which now has my debark date listed as August 5. This all may sound a little ridiculous, but the reason it is so crazy is that the management team is trying to find me a permanent line. Technically speaking, I am only a temporary step-up into the Entertainment Host role. However, if I go home on August 5, when I come back I should be able to come back in a permanent position. So good news, they want to make me permanent! The problem lies in scheduling. So at the moment, until they tell me otherwise, I am coming home on August 5. That’s only four more cruises after this one!
This contract has flown by. I’m loving my job and having an absolute blast in my new role. I got my mid-contract review the other day and along with a glowing report I received some really nice scores as well. I’m right on track in all areas and even excelling in Character Development/Performance(Work Quality/Quantity) and Adaptability. Sometimes it’s just nice to know that people like what you’re doing and think you should be doing it permanently.
I got to meet a celebrity a few cruises ago. I was on Welcome Line and this HR lady comes up with a very serious look on her face and tells me I am not allowed to announce the next guest. (At DCL, we announce each family as they enter over the microphone saying something along the lines of, “Disney Dream, please give a warm welcome to the Smith Family!” etc.) So I was a little put off at this, until I saw who it was. Striding up the gangway in chinos, a chambray button down, and a straw fedora was none other than John Stamos (aka - Uncle Jesse, from Full House). At this point, it took everything in me not to let the words, “Have Mercy!” come flying out of my mouth. He walked over to us and briefly talked with the HR lady who told him that she had given me express instructions not to announce him and then he looked at me and said, “Oh that’s ok, you can just say Welcome Aboard if you want.” and then he shook my hand and smiled. That’s right, I’ve spoken with, and shook the hand of John Stamos. Childhood Dream #456 accomplished! So, I said Welcome Aboard and the whole Stamos clan - aunts, uncles, grandparents, kids, mom, and pop - boarded the ship and made their way to the Walt Disney Suite up on the concierge level.
If that weren’t enough, about ten minutes later one of the ladies from Terminal comes rushing up the gangway and hands me a VIP packet. She tells me that I’m about to welcome Miss Universe on board the ship. Holy smoke! This glamazon woman comes up behind her, easily 6’5”, and one of the most gorgeous women I’ve ever seen. I can’t even tell you what her name was because I was so speechless. My brain was still jumping from John Stamos, and then you throw Miss Universe at me. It was a pretty eventful day on Welcome Line to say the least!
We had a Crew PremEAR of Brave and I finally managed to see it a few weeks ago. It was really cute, and I liked it a lot, but I do have one complaint. There should be a warning before it, which states the following: All persons watching this movie without their mothers are hereby warned of impending meltdowns and tears. Good. Lord. It was almost as bad as the first five minutes of UP! Thanks a lot Pixar for making me cry like a baby at some point in all of your stinking movies! There I am, sitting alone in the Buena Vista theater, watching this movie and missing my mom like crazy. And then, BOOM, major plot points cue the waterworks. The guests in the row in front of me actually turned around to look at me. It was that bad. In fact, it was right up there with my little meltdown the first time I ever saw Believe and Dr. Greenaway dances with and sings to his daughter. Don’t you people know I miss my family?! STOP MAKING ME CRY!
In other news, I’M AN AUNTIE!!!!! Well, not in the human sense... Haley did not have a baby. But she did get a puppy! Well, puppy is a strong word. Captain Jack is a full blood Great Dane. So he’s more like a small horse than a dog. And he has already marked his territory in my car... by throwing up. Haley knows she needs to get that professionally cleaned. And if she hasn’t done so yet, she’s got until August 5 to make it so. I expect to see a receipt as proof. Just saying. But, besides that, he is quite adorable and I can’t wait to meet him!! Check him out!
Well that’s really all I have for you guys at the moment! Life is good, I love my job, and I’m excited to come home in a few weeks!
Until then...
See Ya Real Soon!
With the exception of day to day life on board the ship, the only thing worth note in my life is what’s going on with my contract. That is a grand mystery even I don’t know all the details to.
Let me break it down for you. When I first came on board back in April, my crew id card listed my debark date as September 2. When I first approached my manager about extending my contract I discovered I’d already been extended to September 9. So that was the first change. Then I tried to switch contracts with one of the other Ent Hosts, Nicole, and extend my debark date until October 28. Well while that was trying to go through I was given a new contract to sign which now has my debark date listed as August 5. This all may sound a little ridiculous, but the reason it is so crazy is that the management team is trying to find me a permanent line. Technically speaking, I am only a temporary step-up into the Entertainment Host role. However, if I go home on August 5, when I come back I should be able to come back in a permanent position. So good news, they want to make me permanent! The problem lies in scheduling. So at the moment, until they tell me otherwise, I am coming home on August 5. That’s only four more cruises after this one!
This contract has flown by. I’m loving my job and having an absolute blast in my new role. I got my mid-contract review the other day and along with a glowing report I received some really nice scores as well. I’m right on track in all areas and even excelling in Character Development/Performance(Work Quality/Quantity) and Adaptability. Sometimes it’s just nice to know that people like what you’re doing and think you should be doing it permanently.
I got to meet a celebrity a few cruises ago. I was on Welcome Line and this HR lady comes up with a very serious look on her face and tells me I am not allowed to announce the next guest. (At DCL, we announce each family as they enter over the microphone saying something along the lines of, “Disney Dream, please give a warm welcome to the Smith Family!” etc.) So I was a little put off at this, until I saw who it was. Striding up the gangway in chinos, a chambray button down, and a straw fedora was none other than John Stamos (aka - Uncle Jesse, from Full House). At this point, it took everything in me not to let the words, “Have Mercy!” come flying out of my mouth. He walked over to us and briefly talked with the HR lady who told him that she had given me express instructions not to announce him and then he looked at me and said, “Oh that’s ok, you can just say Welcome Aboard if you want.” and then he shook my hand and smiled. That’s right, I’ve spoken with, and shook the hand of John Stamos. Childhood Dream #456 accomplished! So, I said Welcome Aboard and the whole Stamos clan - aunts, uncles, grandparents, kids, mom, and pop - boarded the ship and made their way to the Walt Disney Suite up on the concierge level.
If that weren’t enough, about ten minutes later one of the ladies from Terminal comes rushing up the gangway and hands me a VIP packet. She tells me that I’m about to welcome Miss Universe on board the ship. Holy smoke! This glamazon woman comes up behind her, easily 6’5”, and one of the most gorgeous women I’ve ever seen. I can’t even tell you what her name was because I was so speechless. My brain was still jumping from John Stamos, and then you throw Miss Universe at me. It was a pretty eventful day on Welcome Line to say the least!
We had a Crew PremEAR of Brave and I finally managed to see it a few weeks ago. It was really cute, and I liked it a lot, but I do have one complaint. There should be a warning before it, which states the following: All persons watching this movie without their mothers are hereby warned of impending meltdowns and tears. Good. Lord. It was almost as bad as the first five minutes of UP! Thanks a lot Pixar for making me cry like a baby at some point in all of your stinking movies! There I am, sitting alone in the Buena Vista theater, watching this movie and missing my mom like crazy. And then, BOOM, major plot points cue the waterworks. The guests in the row in front of me actually turned around to look at me. It was that bad. In fact, it was right up there with my little meltdown the first time I ever saw Believe and Dr. Greenaway dances with and sings to his daughter. Don’t you people know I miss my family?! STOP MAKING ME CRY!
In other news, I’M AN AUNTIE!!!!! Well, not in the human sense... Haley did not have a baby. But she did get a puppy! Well, puppy is a strong word. Captain Jack is a full blood Great Dane. So he’s more like a small horse than a dog. And he has already marked his territory in my car... by throwing up. Haley knows she needs to get that professionally cleaned. And if she hasn’t done so yet, she’s got until August 5 to make it so. I expect to see a receipt as proof. Just saying. But, besides that, he is quite adorable and I can’t wait to meet him!! Check him out!
Well that’s really all I have for you guys at the moment! Life is good, I love my job, and I’m excited to come home in a few weeks!
Until then...
See Ya Real Soon!
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